Joe Fischer is a split personality: a mild-mannered English teacher that turns into a raving, obsessive lunatic when the subject turns to the Minnesota Vikings.  He blogs at Pacifist Viking, and will share his thoughts on the Beloved Purple here at 10,000 Takes.

Viking Offseason: Um, Quarterback?

Continue reading "Pacifist Viking - Viking Offseason: Um, Quarterback?" »

Permalink | Comments (0) |

Kevin Seifert is leaving the Star Tribune for ESPN. Seifert has been the Vikings beat writer since 2000 and covered the team both in print and for the Strib's Access Vikings blog. While this is a big blow to the Star Tribune (sure to be followed in the coming months by other talented writers jumping ship) we'll be able to handle the move knowing Judd Zulgad is still at the Strib covering the Vikes. Carl Gerbschmidt at the Worldwide Leader? We'd love to hear the conversation of Carl's and Stephen A. Smith's first meeting. Quite frankly, that would be hilarious.

MLB: Toronto 6, Twins 5. Would someone please tell Boof Bonser that the game doesn't start in the second inning and that the pitches thrown in the first inning do indeed count? Word on the street is that Boof is really Brad Radke in disguise after some secret University of Minnesota genetics laboratory experiment went wrong. We just report what we hear, people.

Gophers: Nate Hagemo placed on probation.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Most Wednesdays, former lowly KFAN intern turned public relations flack PJS brings 10,000 Takes' loyal following insightful (we tell him that to keep him writing for free) thoughts on Golden Gophers sports. PJS blogs on all things Gophers at Paging Jim Shikenjanski, where he gushes over Tubby Smith and savages Tim Brewster. He blogs from his home in Northern Virginia, where he is mocked for his Minnesota accent.

U Needs Coaching As Much As Talent

When someone talks about the history of Penn State football, it's hard not to talk about the great linebackers that have debilitated opponents in Happy Valley. When someone talks about University of Minnesota football, it's hard not to talk about a recent history of ineptitude.
 
Whether it was Jim Wacker's all-bloat, no results banter or Glen Mason's uncanny ability to wrap his hands around the team's neck in the second halves of winnable games, the Gophers football team has never, in my lifetime, been able to sustain interest from its fan base. It's not that we don't love football. Quite the contrary. Simply put, the vast majority of us are tired of getting our hopes up.
 
While Penn State has been Linebacker U, the Minnesota program has been Laughingstock University.

Continue reading "Paging Jim Shikenjanski - U Needs Coaching As Much As Talent" »

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Come one, come all to the Gopher Garage Sale better known as the Gopher Sports Equipment Sale, Saturday, May 17th at the indoor football complex. The thought of the University of Minnesota selling their used athletic gear to the yard sale crazies seems more the speed of Division III than a Big Ten school. A Gopher yard sale may seem ridiculous, but if we hear Tim Brewster is operating the cash register from a folding chair while pushing Gopher Nation t-shirts on the crazies, then we say "Viva Gopher Nation!"

MLB: Toronto 5, Twins 3. It's time to give up on the 2008 MLB experiment that is Kevin Slowey (0-3 with a 5.79 ERA) until next season. Throw the kid  back down to AAA and give him one more shot next spring.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

In today's episode, The Bird Whisperer tells us:
DON'T PRINT THAT
Twins catcher Joe Mauer probably could hit 30 home runs a season with a minor swing adjustment, but that also could result in 100 strikeouts a season.

Remember Patrick Reusse's column last week, Who'll gather news when Internet is all that there is? The last paragrapgh of the column read, "A doesn't-cost-a-nickel, stand-alone Internet site is not going to have the quality of resources the Star Tribune has mustered for a rich sports section that lands on a doorstep." The last time we checked the Pioneer Press is an example of one of those institutions that Reusse spouted as having greater access to a "quaility of resources" than a stand-alone Internet site. Yet with all that access and resources, readers are still consistently exposed to these types of ridiculous, often ficticious statements from the local fishwraps (we are not forgetting Grandpa Sports, St. Paul). We'd be willing to admit that we agree with 99% of your argument, Mr. Reusse, if you'd be willing to agree that just because you have greater access and resources that doesn't make your work necessarily any better than a "doesn't-cost-a-nickel, stand-alone Internet site."

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

The 2008 Saint Paul Saints pig has been named Boarack Ohama (Boar-AHK O-HAH-muh). We are still angry that the Saints gave our entry, Grandpa Snorts, the Heisman. Hey, Morning Hangover Chick, get Mike Veeck and Bill Murray on the horn, we want an explanation for this travesty.

MLB: Twins 7, Boston 3. Sure, the Twins won three of four from the Sox. Sure, the Twins outhit and outmatched Boston throughout the series. And any other day we would focus our attention more on the games. Today, however, we are more interested in the following story coming out of Red Sox Nation: A Yankees fan has sued a Red Sox fan for injuries sustained to his hand while he was punching said Sox fan in a bar fight. “Typical Yankees fan. You sucker punch me, and then because my tooth goes into your hand, you sue me?” Sanborn, 40, fumed in an interview with the (Boston) Herald. “It just goes to show what a Yankees fan is like. They’re greedy.”

NBA: Part I: Kevin Garnett, Joe Smith, tattoos and Malik Sealy. Part II: Latrell Sprewell's River Hills (Milwaukee suburb along Lake Michigan) home was foreclosed.

Gophers: The Don found another goalie. Jake Kremer of the Bismarck Bobcats (NAHL) has signed with the University of Minnesota for the 2008-09 season. "I grew up loving the Gophers and I watched them every time they were on, this is a dream come true," Kremer said. "The University is great, it's a tough school to get into and it's an added bonus that it's so close to home." A tough school to get into? Harvard is a tough school to get into, Minnesota is...well, Minnesota.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Who is Vic Cegles and why should we care about him? Cegles is the Long Beach State Athletic Director and he had this to say about his head basketball coach, Dan Monson:

Dan's signed some great recruits and the future is bright for us. Mark my words, one day the biggest problem I'll face with Dan is how to keep him in Long Beach and not take a job somewhere else.

We, as you can imagine, are not as confident as Vic Cegles about the future of his head coach. In four years we still picture Monson coaching, but not at the college level. When we gaze into the crystal ball we see Monson at a small school (with three of four hyphens in its name) undergoing a rebuilding job...in Alaska. The team's football coach: Glen Mason.

Life's a beach for Cegles [Press-Telegram]

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

After meeting with general manager Doug Risebrough, Jacques Lemaire has decided to return to coach the Wild for another year. There was "no doubt" Lemaire was returning, despite the importance he placed on the meeting with Risebrough.

MLB: Red Sox 9, Twins 8. 2008 HR's: Adam Everett - 1, Joe Mauer 0.

NFL: Packers relese Koren Robinson. We hear Brett Favre has planned a news conference for later today to discuss how the implications of the Robinson release effect his retirement...This just in...Favre to remain retired.

WCHA: Blake Wheeler gone. Wheeler is the 10th Minnesota player to leave the Gophers early for the pros since the end of the 2005-06 season.

Live From My Mother's Basement... An interview with Britt Robson.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Believe it or not, former Minnesota Timberwolves player and NBA All-Star Christian Laettner has gotten the call from the Hall. If you're thinking the NBA Hall of Fame then that laughter you hear is us mocking you. OK, we'll stop laughing now and set you straight.

Laettner will be inducted into The National Polish-American Sports Hall of Fame on June 12th in Troy, Michigan.

We had no intention of attending the event until we reviewed our invitation and noticed that at the HOF dinner they'll be serving bigos and pierogi, and that we were placed next to Pohland's most famous actress, Izabella Scorupco. How is Troy in June, by the way?

Four Polish sportsman's have been elected into the National Polish-American Sports Hall of Fame [Polish News]

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Richard Jefferson was charged Wednesday with assaulting (choking) a man at the Graves Hotel's Infinity bar back in January. Jefferson discussed the incident on "The Mike and Murray Show:" "It was actually Vince Carter's birthday," he said. "A party. We were actually, you know, all hanging out as a team. I was in our hotel. Actually, I was in the hotel bar. I wasn't at a strip club, you know, three hours away. I wasn't, like, in a casino. I wasn't doing anything. I was literally in our hotel bar and I had an individual come up to me who was very rude and very disrespectful and, you know, an altercation broke out. There were no punches thrown. They were saying there was choking. It was more of a getting your space. This individual doesn't have a scratch on him. There was no mark. There was no blood. There was no anything. Obviously, [athletes] have a target on our back and it is unfortunate that these people would even do this. This incident happened four months ago. I wasn't drunk."

MLB: Twins 13, White Sox 1. You know your having a good day when the opposing starter (Mark Buehrle) is so mad after coming out of the game that he grabs a bat and smashes it five times against a dugout space heater. You also know you're having a good day when Carlos Gomez becomes the first Twin in 22 years (Kirby Puckett) to hit for the cycle.

Guess Who? - Minnesota's Mystery Media Member (4M). Today's Clue: This week's 4M is an EYEWITNESS to sports news.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Joe Fischer is a split personality: a mild-mannered English teacher that turns into a raving, obsessive lunatic when the subject turns to the Minnesota Vikings.  He blogs at Pacifist Viking, and will share his thoughts on the Beloved Purple here at 10,000 Takes.

Viking Offseason: Why Viking fans are so ecstatic about Jared Allen

Viking fans have arisen en masse to celebrate the trade for Defensive End Jared Allen. What is it that has folks so enthused about a single defensive player? Part of it is excitement for Allen himself, who did lead the league in sacks last year. But part of it is for a different sort of sack: the sorry sack pass defense the Vikings have had for years.

Since John Randle left the team, the Vikings have struggled to find a dominant pass rusher. Lance Johnstone had 10+ sacks in 2003 and 2004, but he was a situational player. In Kevin Williams' first two seasons, he had 10+ sacks, but since then he's developed into a more dominant run stopping defensive tackle (he's joined with Pat Williams to give the Vikes dominant run defense the past two seasons).

Continue reading "Pacifist Viking - Why Vikings Fans Are So Ecstatic About Jared Allen" »

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

MLB: White Sox 7, Twins 1. Gavin Floyd was two outs away from a no-hitter until Joe Mauer's double to left-field. It's too bad Floyd didn't seal the deal. If he had, Floyd would have had his first choice of blow-up dolls once he got back to the White Sox's clubhouse.

Darrion Scott: If it turns out that Scott was playing the boy in the plastic bubble with his son by placing a plastic dry cleaning bag over his head, then Scott just punched his ticket for an express trip to hell.  If anyone has the ability to erase someone's mind we are in need of your services. A child with a plastic bag being forcibly held over their head is just too much for us to handle.

Top 10: Worst franchises in pro sports. The Minnesota Twins come in at #7.

Guess Who? - Minnesota's Mystery Media Member (4M). Today's Clue: This week's 4M has a major opening in their sports department.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Piranha Style

Oh man. The view sure is nice from the top, hey?

After a perfect 5-0 homestand, highlighted by not one, but two division rival sweeps that hiked Minnesota's record to 16-14 for a 1.5-game AL Central lead, Twins fans everywhere are feeling pretty good. This marks the first time since 2006 (man, I miss Bradke) the club has swept a homestand. They are officially the only team in the division playing above .500 baseball since the Tigers' pitching resembles that of Special Olympics little leaguers, the Indians couldn't find their bats if they were youknowwhere, the Royals are the Royals, and Chicago's skipper is too busy flipping out to manage his team. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I love Ozzie's rants.

Continue reading "The Twins Babe - Piranha Style" »

Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0) |

Point gurad Verdell Jones decided to take a pass on Dr. Tubby (it may only be an honorary doctor of humanities degree, but that's good enough for us) and will be playing his college hoops at Indiana. We wish Verdell good luck in the NCAA Tournament this...Oops...we wish you luck this season, Verdell. When you hear 'Verdell' do you think of the dog from As Good As It Gets like we do? Just wondering.

Vikings: Pacifist Viking (Joe Fischer) provides weekly Vikings commentary beginning tomorrow.

Guess Who? - Minnesota's Mystery Media Member (4M). Today's Clue: This week's 4M attended the University of Texas-Austin.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Onterrio "The Original Whizzinator" Smith was arrested Friday on suspicion of driving under the influence in Sacramento. We're going to keep this post short and sweet because just like the Timberwolves Isaiah Rider you'll probably be hearing about Smith every 6 months for some new transgression. The last thing we want is for you to get bored with the bit.

Former Vikings running back Smith arrested for DUI [The Mercury News]

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

The Big Ticket is breathing a big sigh of relief after the Boston Celtics destroyed the Atlanta Hawks (Celtics  99, Hawks 65) in Game 7 of their opening round Eastern Conference playoff series. Could you even imagine how badly Kevin Garnett would have been savaged had the C's failed to get out of the first-round of the playoffs? The only person who would have had a smile on his face if KG had flopped: Kevin McHale. He would have had one big, Forbestastic smile.

MLB: Twins 7, Detroit 6. There's no politically correct way to say this so we'll just spit it out. Gardy, we're sorry for your loss, however, since the Twins played so well in your absence how about you take a couple more days off?

Gophers: Guard Verdell Jones cancelled a scheduled visit to Arizona and it's believed he'll announce his decision to attend the University of Minnesota today. We're headed over to the U later to kiss Tubby Smith right on the mouth. We might even grab his ass a little too.

Buzz Bissinger's Rant on Costas: Since we were having trouble on Friday with the site, we didn't have a chance to comment on the Buzzster. The one thing we wish Will Leitch of Deadspin would have thrown at Buzz is the issue of accessibility. Yes, Buzz, a majority of blogs are poorly written (this one included) and a lot are mean spirited (Grandpa Sports is nodding his head right now). However, unlike newspapers and radio, readers really have to go out of their way to read a blog. And if you're not a fan of them, or their quality, it is easy to avoid them. Blogs aren't like the daily newspaper that gets thrown on your doorstep or the all sports radio station you listen to in your car on your way to and from work. There is nothing easier to avoid than a blog. If your a sports fan, try avoiding the Star Tribune, Pioneer Press or KFAN if you live in Minneapolis or St. Paul. The Buzzster wasn't mad at Leitch as a person, he's just angry that his passion (newspapers) is dying right before his eyes. Buzz's problem was that he picked the wrong blogger to battle. When over 350,000 people a day are making their way over to Deadspin, it's obvious that Leitch and the gang have something special cooking. Special enough that people have gone out of their way to find it.

RandBites: Linnemann and Rand talk about everything Wonderlic. That sounds a little dirty.

Site News: We're back from Friday's total metldown. Comments are still acting crazy but we hope that Yahoo! will get things working sometime this week. The Interwebs confuse us so.

Guess Who? - Minnesota's Mystery Media Member (4M). Today's Clue: This week's 4M has received an Edward Murrow Award for sports reporting.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Every week a member of the Minnesota Media will be answering one of our questions in a bit we're calling Minnesota's Mystery Media Member (4M). Here's how it works: we'll post a topic, the 4M anonymously provides a response to our topic, and you dear reader then have one week to figure out the identity of the 4M. Sounds easy enough, right? Each weekday, in The Morning Hangover, we'll give you a clue that will help you identify the 4M. When we post our next Guess Who?, we'll disclose the identity of the week's previous 4M and provide a brand new topic and anonymous 4M response. Let's get started.

Week 3's 4M?: AM 1500 KSTP's Brad Lane. Brad co-hosts "Sunday Morning Sports Talk" with Patrick Reusse and Jim Souhan.

Week 4 Topic: 10,000 Takes at Monte Carlo (yep, sometimes we’re old school like that) with gorgeous female coworker: “We have never wanted to meet our heroes. We don’t want to shake their hand, get their autograph or have them slap us on the back at their book signing. We don’t want to know that our heroes are actual human beings who live in the real world and have real lives, but that they are above reproach when it comes not only to their abilities but also to their character and morals. The same is true for our childhood sports heroes.”

Gorgeous female coworker: “You do understand how warped and delusional you are, right?”

10,000 Takes: “That’s what’s so charming about us.”

You (MMMM guy or gal) are sitting two stools down from charming 10,000 Takes and gorgeous coworker and have had a terrible day. Terrible. Your dog got run over by a Cadillac pulling out of a Metrodome parking lot, your boss was an even bigger idiot than normal, and you just realized that your Bush stimulus check was deposited in your wife’s (who spends money faster than Zygi Wilf) bank account. After a dozen beverages you’ve heard 10,000 Takes and gorgeous female coworker’s discussion and you decide to (a) expose Minnesota athlete/sports figure ____________ (fill in the blank) for the public fraud that he was/is away from Minnesota fans and the media and tack it to the forehead of 10,000 Takes, or (b) reveal to 10,000 Takes that Minnesota athlete/sports figure __________ (fill in the blank) was/is actually as good of a person off the field as they were on the playing field and pin it to the head of 10,000 Takes, or (c) stay at Monte Carlo, send 10,000 Takes home in a cab, and work your magic on gorgeous female coworker. What’s it going to be? Did we mention gorgeous female coworker’s three gorgeous friends are meeting her at the bar in ten minutes?

Continue reading "Guess Who? - Week 4" »

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Former Vikings defensive lineman Darrion Scott was arrested in Eden Prairie for "probable cause felony assault" and was booked on one count of assault, one count of assault/domestic and one count of malicious punishment of a child. Hey, Darrion...you forgot the family pet.

MLB: Twins 4, White Sox 3.  "Another day without hitting," Ozzie Guillen said after the Sox scored three runs or fewer for the third game in a row. "It's tough to win games when you only score two or three runs a game, and that's what we've been doing lately." We been doing that for ten years here in Minnesota, Ozzie. We think you'll survive one week of only scoring two or three runs.

Guess Who? - Minnesota's Mystery Media Member (4M). Today's Clue: I like to hangout with Reusse and Souhan on Sunday Mornings. 

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

New Vikings DE Jared Allen is bringing his league leading 15.5 sacks to Minnesota, his sexually aggressive #69 jersey and a van full of personal bankers to count all the Zygi dollars he will be collecting over the next six years.

One key question regarding Allen's arrival in Minnesota remains unanswered. Will Allen bring the Marching Mullets with him to the Land of 10,000 Takes Lakes? Jared Allen's Marching Mullets is the team name for his group that raises money and walks in the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation (JDRF) Walk to Cure Diabetes each year. As much as we admire the motives behind the Marching Mullets, we hope Allen continues the tradition in Minnesota for another more selfish reason. On the day of the walk we'll have our folding chair in the perfect spot at Lake of the Isles or Lake Calhoun or whatever lake they hold this thing at and we'll sit back and enjoy the reactions of all the Edina soccer moms as they drop their Starbucks double mocha lattes in horror. Minnesota Nice? We don't think so. After seeing a 270 lbs dude with a massive mullet give them the once over, Edina soccer mom will be in her Lexus and flooring it back to her safe zone (50th & France) faster than any of Adrian Peterson's runs last season.

Jared Allen's Marching Mullets [YouTube] 

Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0) |

A low Wonderlic score doesn't mean a quarterback can't succeed in the NFL. Dozens of players have gone on to be successful quarterbacks with a low score. Unlike the Minnesota Vikings, however, most teams don't have two quarterbacks with such low scores on their roster:

Wonderlic score in 2006 for Tarvaris Jackson: 19
Wonderlic score in 2008 for John David Booty: 14

Not sure if it's just us but we wouldn't be surprised if Brad Childress likes the fact that these guys may not be all that bright. A programmable robot that doesn't think on its own may be easier for Childress to train than an intelligent quaterback.

MLB: Twins 3, White Sox 1. Have you taken a gander at Boof Bonser's ERA lately? After six games (36 IP), Bonser has a 3.75 ERA. Jenny Craig is not only helping Boof with the ladies this season, it's paying dividends on mound as well.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Knock Your Sox Off

Just when you think our Minnesota Twins are headed for another disaster of a season, you get a glimpse of what they're capable of.
 
We got to see what the bottom part of the order can do this past Saturday when Jason Kubel, Delmon Young, Craig Monroe and Mike Lamb's bats exploded against Sidney Ponson and the Rangers.
 
Those four combined to go 9-for-18 with 6 RBIs. As an added bonus, Michael Cuddyer had a hit in each of his first three games back from the DL, including a three-run shot on Saturday. Welcome back, buddy. We missed you. A lot.

Continue reading "The Twins Babe - Knock Your Sox Off" »

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Former Timberwolves' guard Isaiah Rider is in the news again. This time a $30,000 bench warrant was issued for the dunker. Remember about a month ago when Rider was driving in Skid Row in what was reported as a stolen car, well Rider must not have remembered the incident because he failed to show up in court for a scheduled arraignment. Somehow the grand theft issue went away, but Rider still needed to face a misdemeanor count of driving with a suspended license. In this case, Christian Laettner was right when he pointed to Rider's locker and said...LOSER (he was right about the other guys too, but he was really right about Rider...we are going to move on now).

Guess Who? - Minnesota's Mystery Media Member (4M). Today's Clue: Jack Baeur.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Jared Juice Is Served But Unfortunately Brian Brohm Wasn't Invited To The Party

Continue reading "Tom's Take - Jared Juice Is Served" »

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

A few thoughts on the Vikings five draft picks:

2nd round - Tyrell Johnson (S) - Hey, Darren Sharper, I'm giving you the finger. Sincerely, Brad Childress.
5th round - John David Booty (QB). The Assassin. He will be gunning for Tarvaris Jackson's job and like most famous killers has three names.
5th round - Letroy Guion (DT). Wasted pick #1.
6th round - John Sullivan (OC). Hey, Matt Birk, I'm giving you the finger too. Sincerely, Brad Childress.
6th round - Jaymar Johnson (WR). Wasted pick #2.

A few thoughts on the draft: The Vikings and Packers trading picks was an odd occurrence. Especially, since the Vikes used the pick to draft Booty. ESPN's Cris Carter wasn't half as annoying as we thought he would be hosting the second day of the NFL draft. Remember, we said half.

MLB: Texas 10, Minnesota 0. Just how bad of a loss was yesterday's debacle: Vicente Padilla become the first Ranger in nearly three years to pitch a complete-game shutout. Wasn't it nice to see our tubby buddy Sidney Ponson pitch for Texas on Saturday. We can't wait to see Sidney pitching in July and August in the 100+ degree Texas heat. Dude will be sweating more than your parents after you bring The Morning Hangover Girl home after a long weekend in Vegas.

Gophers: Jim Wacker would be proud.

Guess Who? - Minnesota's Mystery Media Member (4M). Today's Clue: What's in his cd changer?: Barbara Streisand, Barry Manilow and The Lettermen.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Week 3 Topic: Remember that cupcake physical education course you took at the University of Minnesota in your final semester: The Attitudes and Thoughts of the Contemporary Sports Fan in Minnesota? After an audit of the University of Minnesota's records, it turns out that you didn't complete your last term paper for the class and thus never completed all the requirements for your degree. The U of M forwarded the results of the audit to your employer. Your boss is pissed and requests that you complete the paper immediately. The papers topic: Compare the State of Minnesota's college and professional sports fans in the year 2008 to other fans throughout the United States. No, the ghost of Jan Gangelhoff isn't allowed to help you. You may open your blue book and start now.

Continue reading "Guess Who? - Week 3" »

Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0) |

Before everyone gets all panicked over Francisco Liriano's line yesterday (0.2 IP, 5 H, 6 R, 5 ER, 3 BB, 0 SO & 11.32 ERA), let's not forget the seriousness of his injury. This is a lost year for Liriano (and the Twins) and we all need to grasp that reality.

MLB: Oakland 11, Twins 2. Did you hear the Vikings signed Jared Allen?

NFL: Bet your entire paycheck, or your car, hell, bet your girlfriend or wife...the Vikings will select an offensive lineman with their second round (#16, #47 overall) pick in tomorrow's NFL draft.

Late Show: Where's the flannel, Brett?

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Daunte Culpepper was in Green Bay for an official visit yesterday. Daunte still doesn't have an agent, has never played in the west coast offense, has small hands (we always loved how Minnesota fans blamed everything on Culpepper's small hands) and just isn't any good anymore. Can you say draft subterfuge? Ted Thompson can.

MLB: Oakland 3, Twins 0. The Twins only got one extra base hit (double by Mauer) and failed to give Boof Bonser any run support...again. Meanwhile, not only did Johan Santana pitch seven innings and get the win for the Mets, he also had two doubles. Forget his arm, the Twins could use Johan's stick right about now.

Guess Who? - Minnesota's Mystery Media Member (4M). Today's Clue: He's a 2008 City Pages Best of The Twin Cities Winner. We need your help...got a great question for our Guess Who? bit? Send them to news@10000takes.com and we'll look them over.

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

In today's episode, The Bird Whisperer tells us:
One longtime Twins fan is willing to bet that, at season's end, Twins rookie pitcher Nick Blackburn wil (sic) have a lower earned-run average than ex-Twins starter Johan Santana of the New York Mets.

What's the most outrageous part of the above sentence? The Bird Whisperer narrowing his source down to a longtime Twins fan, Nick Blackburn having a lower ERA than Johan Santana, or that there are actually people who pay money to have this kind of incredible sports insight "dropped" on their doorstep each day.

You're on, Bird Whisperer. We'll take the bet. If Blackburn has a lower ERA than Santana we'll never write another episode of The Adventures of Grandpa Sports and The Bird Whisperer. If Santana has a lower ERA than Blackburn you agree to get an editor. Do we have a deal?

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

The Vikings acquired Pro Bowl defensive end Jared Allen from the Chiefs for a first-round pick (No. 17) and both the Vikings’ third-round picks (73rd and 82nd) in this year's NFL draft (the teams will also swap sixth-round picks). Besides giving up all the picks the Vikings will also be giving up a boat (sorry) load of money. The money is believed to be around $74 million, with just over $31 million of the Zygi dollars guarnateed. Allen will sure look nice next to the Wiliams Wall, but let's not start talking Super Bowl just yet (got that, KFAN). Too many questions remain. What will happen with B-MAC? Will Tarvaris Jackson develop into a playoff quality quarterback? Can Childress coach? Will Matt Birk's contract sitution get resolved? Are the Vikings still short a quality receiver to compete in the playoffs? Can they beat the Packers? And finally, can Allen refrain from jamming his keys into the ignition after throwing a dozen adult beverages back?

MLB: Twins 5, Oakland 4. Why did the Twins beat the A's yesterday? Bad luck; just ask A's manager Bob Geren. "We got beat by a couple of those bloop hits. Those balls were dropping in front of people. It was a little bit of bad luck."

NBA: Defensive Player of The Year: Kevin Garnett. 

Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0) |

Road Trip!

Adam Everett -- whose first name isn't even Adam, it's Jeffrey -- has been placed on the 15-day DL with a "right shoulder strain." Anyone else relieved? Sweet .187 average, Jeffrey. This frees up a spot on the Twins' 25-man roster for Brian Buscher, who had a pretty decent start to his Spring.

He was in the lineup Sunday at third, while Mike Lamb moved to first so Justin Morneau could smash the ball as designated hitter. Buscher went 1-for-4 with a double, which is a start. To quote a buddy in my fantasy league, "How many *&!#%@ Nick Puntos does this team need?!"

Continue reading "The Twins Babe - Road Trip!" »

Permalink