Take 12 - Joel Maturi

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 1

The Setup: University of Minnesota's Athletic Director Joel Maturi discussing telephone calls he had with University President Robert Bruininks during Saturday's Gopher game against 9th ranked Louisville.

10,000 Takes' Take: Some may say Bruininks' priorities should be fundraising, or dealing with the Minnesota State Legislature regarding the U's budget or even recruiting and retaining talented faculty. Not us (and definitely not Grandpa Sports). Having already received our degrees from Minnesota, we believe Bruininks' priorities to be beyond reproach.

Undefeated Gophers men on 'exciting' journey under Tubby smith, athletics director Joel Maturi says [Pioneer Press]

Things That Are Dead - Don Overbeck

It's too bad Ball Talk with Don Overbeck got whacked by the Timberwolves after such a short stint. Even though he was a fictional character, Overbeck was already the third best sports talk show host in the Twin Cities' sports market.

Timberwolves kill latest TV ad campaign [Finance and Commerce]

Etch A Sketch Night At Target Center

If you have forgotten to put a reminder in your Blackberry, tonight is the first Etch a Sketch Night at the Target Center. In the spirit of the event, feel free to draw a special play, or two, or twelve for Kevin McHale and the entire Wolves' coaching staff as they take on the San Antonio Spurs. We'll post all pictures of fans holding an Etch a Sketch at tonight's game, or any game this season, on this site. Send pictures to: news@10000takes.com.

Take 11 - Anthony Carter [10,000 Takes]

Take 11 - Anthony Carter

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 4

The Setup: Former Timberwolves' guard Anthony Carter discussing Kevin McHale's 2005 stint as Wolves' head coach.

10,000 Takes' Take: While we love the Etch A Sketch crack, a guy with a career 5.2 ppg average shouldn't be trashing Hall of Famers. We can't be too upset however, thanks to Carter fans now have a prop to show McHale (and ultimately Glen Taylor) their disappointment with the direction the club has taken. At the next home game (Friday) every fan in attendance should bring a shiny, red Etch A Sketch to the Target Center and hold it over their head when McHale is introduced. When Security at the entrance scans your ticket and asks you: "Is that a Etch A Sketch in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?" Don't look back and run like hell to your seat. This whole Etch A Sketch thing may be the most fun you'll have at a Wolves' game all season.

Nuggets' Carter says McHale will be better [Rocky Mountain News]

Take 10 - Glen Taylor

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 7

The Setup: Timberwolves' owner Glen Taylor discussing the firing of Coach Randy Wittman and the announcement that Kevin McHale will assume coaching responsibilities and no longer handle the Vice President of Basketball Operations' duties.

10,000 Takes' Take: While Taylor is still delusional regarding the talent level on the Wolves' roster, we're thrilled that he finally has set a course for change within the organization. Taylor knows that McHale dislikes the rigors of coaching and anything that will interfere with his fishing and hunting, so by stripping McHale of his VP of Basketball Operations duties, we can't picture McHale lasting 10 minutes after the last regular season game. With the Blueprint For The Future in need of a major rewrite, we can all look forward to the long needed changes that should arrive shortly.

Wolves Relieve Head Coach Randy Wittman [Timberwolves.com]

Things That Are Dead - Randy Wittman

Oh, goody!...here comes McHale. Remember when the Clippers were the laughingstock of the NBA...those were good times.

Wolves coach Wittman out, McHale in [Star Tribune]

Take 9 - Grandpa Sports

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 9

The Setup: Grandpa Sports being Grandpa Sports.

10,000 Takes' Take: Zygi Wilf loves the Vikings more than a drug addict loves crack...more than 30-year-old males love video games...more than Rashad McCants loves himself...more than Ann Carroll loves peroxide...and more than Kevin McHale loves Bill Cosby sweaters. We'd have given Grandpa Sports a 10 on the Absurdity Scale, but we all know he'll top this gem soon enough. Isn't it time some of that buyout paperwork floating around the Star Tribune newsroom finally hit Grandpa Sport's desk? Seriously, this is getting ridiculous.

Bad news might eventually cool Wilf's desire to be Vikings owner [Star Tribune]

Take 8 - Randy Wittman

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 6

The Setup: Minnesota Timberwolves' coach Randy Wittman talking to reporters after losing to the Charlotte Bobcats on Monday.

10,000 Takes' Take: With a career 100-204 coaching record (38-102 as Wolves' coach), what would Wittman know about winning?

Take 7 - Zygi Wilf

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 8.5

The Setup: Minnesota Vikings owner Zygi Wilf discussing Sunday's 34-14 win over the Chicago Bears.

10,000 Takes' Take: You've got to loath the low expectations. Get back to us once the Vikings win a playoff game, Zygi.

Wilf happy with Childress [Star Tribune]

The Star Tribune is Luvabull!

For the past month we've been perplexed over banner ads that keep appearing in the left-hand column, and just below the site banner, on startribune.com/sports. The banner ads read: Love It Live! Follow the Luvabulls to your FREE BULLS TICKETS!

Once you click on the ad it takes you to Ticketmaster for a buy one ticket, get one free offer on Bulls tickets. That's Chicago Bulls tickets. As in the Chicago located in Illinois. Land of Lincoln. Home of The President Elect, Barack Obama. We're not complaining about the banners because the gals are so...well, lovable and the prospect of driving the 408 miles to see the Bulls versus the 10 miles to watch the local five at the Target Center is quite appealing. So why would the Bulls advertise in this market? If you can explain that to us maybe you could also explain the logic behind Randy Wittman's player rotations.

Take 6 - Randy Wittman

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 5

The Setup: Minnesota Timberwolves' coach Randy Wittman discussing the season-ending knee injury to forward Corey Brewer.

10,000 Takes' Take: We love the optimism, but we challenge Wittman to name one player who can come off the Wolves' bench with "great energy," and replace Brewer. While we're waiting for Wittman to come up with someone, mull this thought over. When a team can't replace a mediocre player like Brewer, what does that say about the talent level assembled by the club?

Corey Brewer's season ended by torn knee ligament [Star Tribune]

Take 5 - Gregg Swedberg

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 4

The Setup: Director of Operations for Clear Channel Minneapolis, Gregg Swedberg, discussing Paul Allen's five-year contract to continue hosting a show on KFAN and remain the Vikings play-by-play voice.

10,000 Takes' Take: Five more years of the YADAT! King isn't for everyone (and we're pretty sure that the words talent and PA have never been in the same sentence before), but keep your chin up folks...at least he talks sports on his show....and doesn't go over his golf round shot-by-shot, and doesn't read verbatim from the Star Tribune and Pioneer Press, and doesn't scare small children with giant billboards...

Allen signs five-year KFAN contract [Star Tribune]

Take 4 - Randy Wittman

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 2

The Setup: Timberwolves' coach Randy Wittman on Mike Miller.

10,000 Takes' Take: Nope. Sorry, coach. Miller isn't even close to eight rebounds and seven assists a game. Through 12 games Miller is averaging 5.4 rebounds and 4.6 assists.

'Pass first, shoot second' game paying off for Wolves' Miller [Star Tribune]

Take 3 - Ray Edwards

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 3

The Setup: Vikings' DE Ray Edwards discussing his $25,000 fine by the NFL for a late hit on Tampa Bay quarterback Jeff Garcia and leg-whip on a Tampa offensive lineman.

10,000 Takes' Take: Let's face it...Edwards is facing a 4th down and 35 yards in the old IQ department, so nothing that comes out of Edwards' mouth is all that surprising. Such as this gem: "I look up to Strahan. I learned a lot from him watching and studying his film. This year I definitely plan on going out here and breaking Strahan's record of 22 and 1/2 sacks this year." With 2.0 sacks, Edwards is only 20 and 1/2 sacks short of Strahan's record with six games remaining this season. You'd think that Edwards would shut his yapper, play football, and hope that people would forget about his insane prediction. Have fun with all the jokes running through your head about how you know dozens of panty-wearing women who would have more than 2.0 sacks if they played with Ray Allen and The Williams Wall.

Edwards not happy with fine [Access Vikings]

Take 2 - Paul Allen

Absurdity Scale (1-10): 7

The Setup: KFAN's Paul Allen implying, in PA's Prattle, that Vikings' FB Jeff Dugan should be active every game for the remainder of the '08 season.

The flaws in Allen's take: Dugan's 2008 statistics: 0 rushing yards and 0 receiving yards in 4 games. Let's also not forget that minor issue of RB Adrian Peterson saying he doesn't like to run behind a fullback.